this is my Real Life......../ simple plan , welcome to my life

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gawcyODiKls

I know that to many I am seen as this "smart, lucky kid." But the truth is, that's not always me. When I say that I mean, I'm not this naturally smart genius that people think I am. Here's how I can explain it. My life started out as this complete entire negative vibe. All because of the hatred that my "family" had for my mother. Not because she is this horrible person, but because she was so amazingly perfect. In my family for some reason everything is about competition. When my dad married my mom my uncles and aunts all felt this rage for my mother for being a successful women, who by the way was only trying to start this happy family. They began to hate her even more after she showed how loving she was. How this relates to me is, ever since I was born their has been this hidden cult in my family that hates me for being the son to my mother. I have worked so hard to be successful just to protect my mother. No matter our situation all I care about is taking care of my mother and achieving my dream. It's not to be a lawyer, this scientist or doctor, but to be a star. Truth is, I was extremely affected by the situation. Their is more in essance that I just can't speak about. My life started out wrong but yet correct. I'll explain that as we get more into it. Honestly, at the age of only eleven I was about quite ready to end my life. And I tried, but as I countinued to do so, something or some beautiful voice always told me that things were going to get better. So I listened. I'm sixteen now and about to be seventeen and I can already tell you about all of my memories. Like when I would cry to myslef or when I was sent into a menatl institution for three days. (Not for being crazy, but for emotional reasons). My life is a roller coaster and I wish I could say it all, but life just isn't ready for it yet. I will one day. I just wish that people could know how I really am. Especially the students from school. The truth is, Im an actor, dancer, and a part-time rapper. People just don't know that yet. That is something that I use to keep away from life. I never wanted to dedicate my whole life to school. It was just that my family became "extremely" poor. Our family was supposed to get evicted from our home on christmas night. Luckily God has always been with us. Now don't get me wrong. Im not this crazy "negative" person. I feel that I am actually one of the most naturally happy people in the world. It was just that I had to go through certain situations to learn and grow. And that was completely ok. When I say that my life started out correct, it's because I know that my experiences were all done to help me grow. Honestly without them I would not be able to even socialize with someone without sweating. I look foward now. I'm auditioning and rocking my own world!

MY Tio Cesar!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He was always known to me as "Tio Cesar". In english that would sound like "Uncle Ceaser".
His character was always described to me as an inspiring and yet goofy, funny man when it came to baseball.Unfortuanetly due to family seperation reasons we have always failed to meet. But then out of the bloom, everything changed. His car appeared to be a light-brown faded color and surprisingly, extremely shiny as he drove the hill to reach our house this past friday morning.(well, thats because it was sunny at our hill, lol). I still failed to clearly see his face as the spark from the sun dimmed my sight. Then there it was. His small black shoe and white long sock stuck out of the small car with the rest of his dark-brown featured left leg. Suddenly we were face to face as I stood at our front porch and he at the side of his car. I could'nt believe it and by
the strong expression on his face I knew he couldn't believe either. Tears fell from his face and the worlds greatest smile came right after that. I could now see that the character he was always described to be was indeed his true personality.
We went inside and sat on our small, green couches where we all talked for a chance to get to know eachother. He spoke of his long love for baseball, specifically the "Dodgers." I was so happy that I have always been a great dodger fan. I was thrilled to see that we were so much alike. He brought us delicious food and a copy cd from a mexican band i have been wanting to listen to. Altough we had never met, I felt like supernaturally or by heart we have always been together. As if he were watching over me. I knew I had an angel from mexic(lol). In his only two days with us, I saw a father I had always wished I had. It seems like my legendary "Tio Cesar" really is a legend after all.

Setting

I see the crowd of happy smiles
I see the impatience growing from the birthday boy
I see the two gray dogs sniffing the cooking meat
I see the neighbors running and playing and running in the middle of the street
I see the man next door watching television in his bedroom
I hear the laughter of children playing in the middle of the street
I hear the loud music coming from the dj
I hear the tiny footsteps of the two gray dogs as they walk by me
I hear the neighbors asking for a plate of meat
I hear the wooden door banging into the wall as people exit the house
I smell the great sense coming from the mexican rice
I smell the stinky smell coming from the dogs urine
I smell the smoke from the lit cigaratte from the man next door
I smell the melted cheese coming from the kitchen
I smell the stinky sense coping from a little girls dirty shoe
I feel the gum stuck at the bottom of my shoe
I feel the hard bump coming from the dj's loud music
I feel the dust fom the ground blow into my face with the air
I feel a sudden headache coming because of the smell of the dusty ground
I feel the hard material that is put together on my seat
I can taste the burned meat
I can taste the perfectly cooked mexican rice
I can taste the disqusting smell from the dogs urine
I can taste my own saliva
I can taste the smoke from the man's ciggarrette next door

Response to lyrics

RESPONSE: The lyrics on this song are dedicated to my grandparents and to the rest of my fathers side of the family. It seems like everything I do and work hard for doesn't exist in their minds. They fail to remember my name and yet they do what they can to bring me down. So in this song when they say every step I take is another mistake to yoy, that really relares to my "told" identity.

I'm tired of being what you want me to beFeeling so faithless lost under the surfaceDon't know what you're expecting of mePut under the pressure of walking in your shoes(Caught in the undertone just caught in the undertone)Every step I take is another mistake to you(Caught in the undertone just caught in the undertone)I've become so numb I can't feel you thereI've become so tired so much more awareI've becoming this all I want to doIs be more like me and be less like youCan't you see that you're smothering meHolding too tightly afraid to lose controlCause everything that you thought I would beHas fallen apart right in front of you(Caught in the undertone just caught in the undertone)Every step that I take is another mistake to you(Caught in the undertone just caught in the undertone)And every second I waste is more than I can takeI've become so numb I can't feel you thereI've become so tired so much more awareI've becoming this all I want to doIs be more like me and be less like youAnd I knowI may end up failing tooBut I knowYou were just like me with someone disappointed in youI've become so numb I can't feel you thereI've become so tired so much more awareI've becoming this all I want to doIs be more like me and be less like youI've become so numb I can't feel you thereIs everything what you want me to beI've become so numb I can't feel you thereIs everything what you want me to be

Bio Poem

Jelani
Child of jose and Imelda
Who loves acting and going to church
Who hates when others try to bring him down
Who wants to go to Mexico, Nayarit
Who wishes he could've met his family that lives in Mexico
Who is scared of spending his life alone
Who dreams of of becoming a star
Who is determined to live a happy life
Who values his family
Who is proud of his personal growth
Who graduated from Devine Savior
Who lives om Los Angeles, Ca
Jelani